21 October 2009

Myths of the Swine Flu

21 October 2009

"Myths of the Swine Flu"

People.

Let's get the record straight on some things about the swine flu epidemic that is sweeping the country.

As you all fill the ER's (mine in paticular), there are a few things that need to be addressed before you decide the the end is near and that runny nose that you have is not your brains bleeding out.

Listen closely: (These are all ACTUAL THINGS PEOPLE HAVE TOLD ME)

First, because you had a cough for like 20 minutes doesn't mean you have it....

If you decided to dip your pen into the company ink and now you have burning when you urinate...it is NOT the Swine Flu.

Also, if you went to Denny's and had a plate full of bacon and now your stomach hurts..it is NOT the swine flu.

If you watched the news and they told you that you have the swine flu...come on in, let me punch you in the face...and send you home...because you DON'T have it.

Because you live in the town NEXT to the town that had ONE case in their school...you have it....BUZZ!!!! NO YOU DON'T.....

Because you drove through the country this past weekend....

Because your neighbor just came back from Kentucky....

And finally, my personal favorite,

Because you work with Mexicans....

YOU DON'T HAVE THE SWINE FLU!!!!!!

A public Service announcement.....


Rounding Third and Heading Home,
M-